We’ve finally uncovered the mystery of how to join the Illuminati
secret society! All of these years of secret handshakes, conspiracy
theories, and pyramids and we’ve finally found out the membership
requirements.
Hip-hop has taken over Illuminati and since the people of the underground say that Jay-Z is the leader, we guess that means that we should follow in his footsteps. Rapping isn’t easy and neither is world domination. If rappers can do it, why can’t we? Thanks to us, the answer is now you can.
After having a dream about the Illuminati, we here at GlobalGrind were given a distinct and very specific vision of 10 simple ways of joining the very exclusive secret society.
If you follow these steps, which are in no particular order, we promise that you’ll receieve a letter in the mail from Jay-z himself granting you membership! Here are 10 things you can do that will increase your chances of becoming a part of Illuminati!
First call of order is:
1. Get signed to Roc-a-Fella records.
FOR 9 MORE WAYS TO JOIN THE ILLUMINATI VISIT THE NEXT PAGES!
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Hip-hop has taken over Illuminati and since the people of the underground say that Jay-Z is the leader, we guess that means that we should follow in his footsteps. Rapping isn’t easy and neither is world domination. If rappers can do it, why can’t we? Thanks to us, the answer is now you can.
After having a dream about the Illuminati, we here at GlobalGrind were given a distinct and very specific vision of 10 simple ways of joining the very exclusive secret society.
If you follow these steps, which are in no particular order, we promise that you’ll receieve a letter in the mail from Jay-z himself granting you membership! Here are 10 things you can do that will increase your chances of becoming a part of Illuminati!
First call of order is:
1. Get signed to Roc-a-Fella records.
FOR 9 MORE WAYS TO JOIN THE ILLUMINATI VISIT THE NEXT PAGES!
2. Become an extra in Kanye’s ‘Monster’ video remake since the original video was leaked.
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3. Always carry a dollar bill in your back pocket…not in your front pocket…your BACK pocket!
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4.
Shake someone’s hand firmly. Particularly a rich white guy’s hand. But
if that’s not possible…Delonte from around the way will do just fine.
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5. Go to your local seamstress and get a triangle stitched on the back of a cute black jacket.
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6. Capture a bald eagle.
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7. Get a job at the George Bush Sr. Library and Museum. You can
be a customer service greeter or a flash light cop, just make sure you
score a job.
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8. Dress up as drag queen or become a monster and listen to Lady Gaga
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9. Simply have one of your friends make a YouTube video about
you and include background music with organs, tubas, and don’t forget
the violins.
[pagebreak]
10. Take a picture of ONLY 1 of your eyes, and then photo-shop a triangle around it.
[pagebreak
As you can see, we thought it would be funny to poke fun at conspiracy theorists in a good
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